a. dellos
Meditation & Poetics
Meditations on Motherhood, the Met, & Mother Earth
The Hurly-Burly Girl Takes on the World
Pregnant and alone –
a mother left by the side of the highway.
Shivering as the cars raced by,
ignoring her.
Summer smiles outlined with cherry red popsicles.
Laughter and silly screeches,
running fast, trying to catch the hazy blue sky.
Finally, a kind woman stopped – food, shelter, fresh hay
given freely for the mother
to lay down her weary head
and give birth.
Juicy flowers blooming in fuchsias and corals on your blanket,
but don’t let the bed bugs bite;
one more, you are my sunshine,
then it’s time for bed, little mouse, little mouse.
Nice homes were found for all her children –
except one.
The runt.
Band-aids were your favorite “kiss it and make it better” currency.
It was all so easy then when you wore jelly sandals and a plastic crown
But did I know it at the time?
The crater in my heart grew until it became too much.
I lost daughter to the hours whipping by.
I lost mother to the heavens after her temporal lobe fractured her into scattered subatomic particles.
I became the loss.
I needed you.
They sent us your picture – you wore rainbow fairy wings.
And like that, four became;
five.
When you welcome me home, your whole body wiggles.
To wake me up—you stick your tiny warm pink tongue up my nose.
You fend off strangers with your brave toy growls,
but an errant plastic bag blowing in the wind makes you shiver?
You’re our miniature Halley’s Comet lighting up our atmosphere.
***
Hurling herself toward the big wide world,
Pulling hard against her restraints,
Trying to catch sunlight and moonbeams,
She chases after shadows in the snow.
